Girls Paddling/Girl’s Paddling

Mar 28, 2017 by

If one searches girl and paddle, or any combination or derivation thereof …

 

One is apt to find pictures like the two above. This is not at all unfortunate, and let me just say that we have come a long way since the canoe and the kayak, vanilla paddling wise.

 

Generally, this is more the sort of image I have in mind when I search girl paddling, or, more accurately, girl’s paddling.

 

Although these are models in dramatized situations, the sad truth is that similar scenes are enacted, for real, all too often in American schools. You may take my tirade against such barbarity as read, since I have mentioned often enough, both in fiction and in essay, the repugnance I feel for striking children in any setting, so I’ll just carry on with the fantasy portion of this post.

 

 

Here, for instance, one has to assume that the reason she has been called to the make-believe principal’s office has to do with a dress code violation. On the other hand, it seems the principal needs to be called for bad aim, if that mark on her thigh came from his paddle.

 

In addition to pretend principals, pretend dads (and uncles, of course) also believe in the efficacy of wood in correcting a girl’s behavior. In this case, however, one wishes he did not also believe in fake cowhide upholstery for the family bar stools. What was he thinking?

 

 

This dad prefers to take her to the bedroom for correction. I’m not sure any of my girls would keep still without my steadying hand on her long enough to get her bottom that toasty red. But, again, these are models, so we must check our disbelief at the door.

So whether you’re girl paddling or paddling girls, always act on your fantasies safely, sanely, and consensually.

That is all.

Devlin out.

 

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More Desks; More Girls

Mar 23, 2017 by

One of the most often clicked posts in our archive is one called Desks Are For Bending Girls Over.

 

Then, just recently, the subject of traditional school desks came up again in the comments section. So, here you are, Gary! This is what we need – not only can one make her bend over from the rear (!) but this model doubles as a kneeler, sort of like the birching blocks at Eton and other public schools before Queen Victoria decreed that the cane be used, instead.

Of course, any old desk or table can be made to work …

 

Assuming that the people involved know what they’re doing, which is not always the case. (Sorry, Secretary fans, but I truly wanted to grab Spader and shake him out of his wooden lethargy.)

 

For the purposes of our particular brand of antique correction, however, nothing beats (!) an antique desk for setting the mood.

 

School desks, whether antique or modern, have to be of sturdy construction just to withstand the wear and tear of daily hard use by students.

 

This is to say nothing of the hard usage that strict professors put them to.

 

So whether one is using paddle …

 

Tawse …

 

Or cane, the proper furnishings can add so much to the experience.

I need to go antique shopping.

That is all.

Devlin out.

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Cane Break!

Mar 20, 2017 by

 

No implement is indestructible, of course. Still, it’s rather disheartening when a favorite disassembles before one’s eyes and right in the middle of a very strict lesson.

Right, Gary?

Here is the culprit. She claims she is not responsible for the unfortunate demise of the malacca stick, but whom else am I to blame?

Truth to tell, this variety of palm tree cane is much lighter and more porous than rattan, and if one is careful, what’s left is perfectly serviceable. At least until I get a senior girls’ cane, which is definitely on my most wanted list. 

That one will be the sturdier brown rattan, and we’ll just see if any naughty bottom can damage such an item!

All for now.

Devlin out.

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Spring Break!

Mar 18, 2017 by

And not a moment too soon for some girls.

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Happy Birthday, Uncle Dev!

Mar 17, 2017 by

It’s that time again!

Time for green beer, leprechauns, pots of gold, and corned beef with cabbage.

But most importantly, it’s time for chocolate cake with green icing and our own very special, very stern Uncle/Professor/friend’s birthday!

Many of your little miscreants and friends have submitted love messages to help you celebrate, Uncle Dev.  So grab some cake, a beer (I suggest Guinness with that cake), sit back and relax, and click right here to feel the love.  Soak it up and revel in the fact that you are very loved.  Yes, you’re going to need some tissues!

(Special thanks to the BG for scoring the slideshow and holding my hand when things got dicey!)

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