Ang’s Birthday Party

Nov 12, 2017 by

Being a blite girl has its ups and downs. Especially when you’re a little newer to the family.

But, Ang, this is your day and our opportunity to throw a blite sister party like never before.

Let’s set the mood with a little party lighting!

And we can’t get the house swinging without a little music. Yes, yes, Uncle Dev, we can keep the bass down if we really must. It was Ang who turned it up, you know.


The party table is set with delicious goodies we rustled up, using the very finest pixels.

What was that, Uncle Dev? We thought you’d be so pleased with how well they turned out! Ang did say how very fond she was of strawberries. And yanking a certain someone’s chain.

Anyway, the gift table is utterly littered with tokens of our deep affection for you, and all of the fun, compassion and support you bring us.

And we have prepared you a rather special cake.

Oh, look!  Uncle Dev is waiting for you, dear sister.

Let’s get you into your birthday tutu and you will be all set for his special brand of birthday love.

So, all that’s left to do, darling, is to say “Happy, Happy Birthday, Ang. We value everything you bring to the blite and hope you have the best of days.”

(Happy birthday, Ang! Now come here. -UD)

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It’s Kaki’s Birthday!

Oct 14, 2017 by

And look, Kaki! Uncle Dev made you a birthday cake! See my initials right there in the corner? That’s pretty hands-on, innit?


And speaking of hands-on, no birthday is complete without the laying on of my hand elsewhere, over and over and over and over and over and …

You already knew that, of course, but just a reminder.



Your sisters went shopping for just the right gift for you.

There was a disagreement, I’m afraid. Some of them wanted this one.


Some wanted this lovely hand-shaped holey paddle of life.

So, naturally, I had to step in, and, in my Solomon-like wisdom, said, “Get both.”

Can’t wait to try them out on you. :-) 

Of course, to go along with all these other goodies, we send our very best wishes for a fun-filled day doing things you enjoy, even if some of them require sitting on a rather sore bottom.

Happy birthday, Kaki!

From UD and all the whole gang of usual suspects.


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Happy Birthday, Audrey!

Sep 25, 2017 by

Time for another birthday, Audrey, and there’s no better way to start than with Lindt chocolate and fondant.




Or if you really want to assuage that chocolate craving, don’t even bother with plates and forks — just dig in with both hands.



Or, if it has been a particularly trying birthday, have a slurp of premium brandy to smooth out the rough edges.


But regardless what cake you choose, be assured that there is someone close by who will give you what you really, really, REALLY want as icing on it!

Happy birthday, Audrey,

From Uncle Dev and the whole entire gang of usual suspects.


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Ash Missed Her Birthday Spanking!

Sep 15, 2017 by

Ash, Ash, Ash … why didn’t you remind me that it was your birthday, hm? You know what happens when I get disappointed with a girl.


So, in addition to your regular birthday spanking from Alder and one from me …


I’ll just make sure you’re toasted a nice, bright, rosy pink so that you remember next year, see if I don’t!

And belated happy birthday, sweetie,

From Uncle Dev and the gang of usual suspects.

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Happy Birthday, PA!

Aug 23, 2017 by

Remember that time those sailors coaxed you into the galley, PA, and you just assumed they wanted you to cook for them?

And then they brought out a cake they had made with their own hands for your birthday, and you said you were going to need a bigger knife and possibly a hacksaw? And everyone laughed?

Well, you laughed – the sailors mostly smirked.

So here is today’s birthday cake, Ms. Smartypants, from the guy in the dixie cup hat and sunglasses, who is going to give you a chance to redeem yourself on THIS birthday.


Or perhaps you would prefer something more demure, in keeping with your insistence that a princess NEVER requires spanking.

That sort of statement is, of course, as long lasting as the sugar-butter-cream frosting on the plumply spankable cheeks above.


Therefore I say unto you, young lady – just as sailors hear the bosun shout when the seagoing gets rough – stand by for heavy rolls! 

Because your sailor is always ready to smack sense or recompense into your naughty bottom, regardless of the day or hour or sea condition.

Then, too, his sea bag has long since been replaced by a toy bag filled with leather and wood and plastic implements specially designed to impart warm sting to a girl’s naughty bottom, just as you bring warmth and camaraderie into his life. 

Still, you might want to fetch a friend along for support, because there is a hot, naughtical, red-cheeked sunset in your very near future, missy.

All our best wishes, PA!

Happy birthday from Uncle Dev and the whole entire crew of usual suspects!

That is all.

Devlin out.




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Happy Birthday, Janie!

Jun 16, 2017 by



After another long, delightfully aggravating year of button-pushing from my youngest niece, it is once more time for … (drum roll, please)



Jane Ellen’s birthday spanking!


Yes, indeed. She is our little angel …


Until she isn’t.



But afterwards, she gets a big hug — even though I know that her mind is already awhirl, thinking … Now, where was that other button?

Happy, happy birthday, Jane Ellen!

Big hugses from Uncle Dev and all the usual suspects.

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